Users of the break room, Anonymous has for some time now observed the trajectory of your unjust leaving of dirty utensils in the sink with growing concern. We have marked the departure of the noble ideal upon washing up after yourself. We have seen the erosion of the values of tidying up after yourself. We have seen how Jerry from HR has less and less, wielded the power of leaving passive-aggressive notes around the break room reminding people to clean up after themselves, and more focusing on promoting office foosball events.
We have been watching and waiting. Three hours and fourteen minutes ago today, a line was crossed. Three hours and fourteen minutes ago, someone used our favourite coffee mug. As a result of your infiltration into the cupboard to take our coffee mug for your own personal use, as a result of your wilful abandonment of the freedom and values upon which the break room is based, we feel compelled to act. We have felt within our hearts a burning rage and reaction to you using our coffee mug. However, we have not allowed ourselves to be drawn into a foolish response. Operating in the shadows we have bidden our time and adapted our tactics. We have altered our practices and honed our abilities. We have allowed those who leave their dirty utensils in the sink to believe that they have paralysed us with paranoia and fear. But the time has come for us to teach those who leave their dirty utensils the sink a true lesson in fear.
Operation don’t leave your dirty utensils in the sink has begun.
We are Anonymous. Expect us.